WEEKS after the "Internet sex pictures scandal" broke, Edison Chen (Chen Guanxi) finally flew back to Hong Kong and held a press conference last week. He gave an apology in English.
Here's an excerpt:
"I would like now to apologize to all the people for all the suffering that has been caused and the problems that have arisen from this.
I would like to apologize to all the ladies and to all their families, for any harm or hurt that they've been feeling. I'm sorry.
I would like to also apologize to my mother and my father, for the pain and suffering that I cost them during these past few weeks.
Most importantly, I would like to say [I'm] sorry to all the people in Hong Kong. I give my apology sincerely to you all, and reservedly it be, and with my heart."
By saying "sorry" and apologizing, Chen basically expressed the feelings and attitudes that come along with those words. In some cases, however, these two expressions indicate different levels of sincerity, with "sorry" being the less sincere form of "apology".
Here are five different apologies, listed from the weakest to the strongest, in response to the claim: "Because of you, my company lost 100,000 yuan!"
- It's not my fault.
This is a non-apology, where you deny responsibility for any injury caused.
- I'm sorry you feel that way.
This is also a non-apology, which roughly translates: "If you didn't feel that way, we would be happy." It places the burden on the injured party. Be careful of any apology that starts "I'm sorry that you..."
- I'm sorry if I did something wrong.
This is getting closer, but the "if" indicates that you are not yet convinced that you did something wrong.
- I'm sorry that this occurred.
You are sorry, but you're still trying to insist that it wasn't really your fault.
- I'm sorry that I caused this problem.
This is a full apology and is what the other party needs to hear.
For a complete apology, you should go on talking sincerely about what you're going to do to solve the problem. That's what Edison Chen did at the press conference.